Yesterday was Princess' last day of school. I just couldn't make her keep going, faking it that I thought it was for the best. I don't think it's for the best, and she knows that. I appreciate the thoughtful and supportive comments I've gotten on previous posts. I hear what you're all saying, and I agree that sometimes you just need to stick things out. I think an important point, though, is that my husband and I decided school might be a better choice now for our son, and Princess was tagging along on that decision. She quickly came to regret her choice, and I decided we don't need to make her keep going just to make a point.
If kids out there are trying to figure out how to get what they want, I'll give them a tip because Princess played this out perfectly. She didn't whine about it, she wasn't hysterical. When I told her I'd think about it, she's patiently wait for me to bring up the topic again. She didn't exaggerate or get all dramatic. She said school wasn't horrible; it wasn't scary; there were some things she liked. But overall, she'd still rather be home for now.
My husband thinks if she'd had a different teacher, things might have been different. I agree, but I don't want to blame the teacher. She was kind and welcoming. She could have been more sensitive, however, to how Princess might react to being sent into the hallway to finish her math, for example. Another homeschooler who used to work as a teacher referred to it as a "mild form of punishment" that kids in school get desensitized to. Princess found it to be humiliating. She also recognized how it didn't solve the problem of her not knowing how to do the math.
Gameboy, meanwhile, seems to like school OK. He doesn't love it, but he's dealing well, and seems to like having more work to do than what I gave him. When Princess is 12 — and that's three years away — maybe she'll feel that way, too.
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8 comments:
Princess is a smart and mature kid. Your responsiveness to her needs (and your other kids' needs, too, of course) is great role-model material. :)
(I agree that the teacher makes or breaks it, by the way. S has had both horrible and outstanding teachers, and it's like living in different worlds.)
Princesses should be happy!
And so should dragons. And Gameboys. And dinosaurs, and squirts, and tigers and sweet peas.
It makes sense to let her choose. You let her choose to go, why not let her choose not to?
The things she didn't like aren't going to change and that's significant. And it's not like she wanted to go because she was discontent at home. She wanted to try it and now she has.
she looks both exhausted and relieved in that top photo. glad you all got things worked out.
If this were Facebook, I'd click "LIKE"! :)
Fabulous, my dear! Its great to see the kids figuring out what they do and don't like, and I think its great how you've chosen to handle it. :) You *still* rock!
She tried it, she didn't like it. She's done for now. Kinda like trying vegetables. Man, I could never imagine having to eat a tomato ever again. Gah! But I did learn that I like sun dried tomatoes. She'll take away something positive even if she did not like the whole dish.
Do you know what I am saying?
It's late...
I feel your pain. My daughter went to school in 5th grade at her own decision. My middle one started K with her at that school. Now all 3 are in school and the youngest is crying daily. I want to pull him out but don't know if brother would do well without him. I think you have to do what is best for each kid at that time. Things change.
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